LOVE BITES...SO BITE BACK

"I don't have a Valentine this year for the first time in FIVE years. 

How can I snap out of these Valentine's Day Blues?"

For real?! You want us to feel sorry for you that you are alone on Valentine's Day for the first time in FIVE years?! I know some people that have been alone EVERY Valentine's Day and they don't sit around feeling sorry for themselves. If you are throwing a pity party darlin', then you are on your own. I am a firm believer that just because you are alone doesn't mean you can't have a fab V-day!!! First of all, go get yourself something nice. Splurge, for crying out loud, it's Valentine's Day!! Ladies, go get yourself a dozen roses. Just because you are footing the bill doesn't make them any less beautiful sitting on your table top. Or better yet, go get that bag you have had your eye on that you told yourself you couldn't afford. Fellas, you too, go buy those awesome shades you have always wanted that those dumbshit girls you dated never bought you.  Make this day about me, myself, and I. Think about it, it will probably be the best Valentine's Day gift you have ever received. Another thing that can make you feel better is to know that you are NOT the only one alone on Valentine's Day. Grab your single friends and go out to dinner, get drunk, and make fun of all the past idiots you USED to spend V-day with. This is ALWAYS a good time. And, who knows, your slutty ass might even find another lonely soul to smush with on this pagan, sex-crazed holiday. 

So my lonely people, get out and do something nice for yourself instead of holing up in your house all alone watching sappy movies while crying in your gallon of rocky road. You will just make your eyes puffy and your ass fat and you will never find a Valentine that way...Sink your teeth in bitches, HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY :)

And that is...WHAT I THINK! HA!